Saturday, March 23, 2013

Cycles of Life

Do you ever feel like your life goes through cycles? I know I do & sometimes I feel like I am on the Spin Cycle just a little to long. I am beyond grateful for all our wonderful blessings, but even in the blessings there comes a certain amount of stress. I have been super busy with everyday mom duties lately that seem unending with no break in sight. I don't mind I love being a mom but sometimes it does get overwhelming. Like your being pulled in fifty different directions because each child needs something a little different. Then throw in your little tiny corner of suppose to be a wife too & the spin cycle begins!

Between medical appointments, school activities, dog training, & training for a half while injured , mentally I'm just done. I've laid around in pjs for a day doing nothing but watching mindless tv while folding stacks of laundry, but that didn't seem to help. As a mom your brain just never get;s to turn off. As a mom of a child with crazy medical even when you are away for a few hours it's still in the back of your head that the phone could ring any minute & everything could turn up side down. My feelings were recently hurt when I was told it wasn't a certain person's fault I chose not to relax & take breaks. Well let's think about that, if I am away from home I should be able to relax some, but I am a mom a parent so that comes with responsibility of always being ready for anything. Also as a army wife who has done multiple deployments learning to turn off is just almost impossible. 
My husband went away for a year, he turned off the family business to focus on war, his men, staying alive, his job He had to to survive.Now I envy that he seems to still be able to do this so easily now that he is home. I stayed behind every time dealing with kids, household messes, extended family issues,medical issues, war, single parenting, worry over other spouses losses,& army. It sometimes feels like we get double duty and in doing multiple deployments it get's harder eachtime to learn to relax when the other half of your parenting team is finally home. It's also frustrating when you watch them casually go about life with what looks like the only stress is work, like they are still able to leave for days with no issues about parenting & all the things around the home that still need attending. I wish I could do this but I can't, I need to learn how. 
For now life is in the spin cycle of my world. I have a lot of balls in the air, just hoping none fall causing total chaos. Here is a snap shot of last weeks crazy but a lot of fun as well. I wouldn't change the crazy because then I would have missed out on the smiles from the boys, or the cuddles from the puppies.But sometimes I wish I had a double to help out with the chores-lol

Mail day for Balto & Jeremy, we get a lot of fun things so we try to reply to as many as possible. But it does take time. This is only one letter, I actually had a bag full of items to ship out to our friends.

Puppy Playtime takes up time as well, it's fun but no down time with puppies in the house.I also had puppy training at night the past few weeks. It's a 45 minute drive each way to class :0/

My youngest got asked to go on an all day Science Fair for school. They were short on parents so at the last minute I went to help with Balto. It was so fun, but very draining day with puppy in tow. But I loved seeing Jacob enjoy the congress so much. He thrives on education.

We got accepted to go to the Sturge-Weber Conference & Kids Day Camp in July. The foundation will cover our hotel & registration fees we come up with airfare. I spent hours brainstorming coming up with fundraising ideas. We have some amazing people step up and offer items for auction. But it taking a lot of time to run & brain power. I am falling asleep by 8:30 at night but have to wait to go to bed until 10PM so puppy can go out to potty one last time. I also get up between 5AM-5:30 every morning-YIKES!
We made the appointments for Jeremy to have another surgery in April & spring break over night plans.  All these things done by yours truly, just typing it out exhausts me. Then you throw in trying to get my running in to train for my half with a rib injury that sometimes hurts sometimes doesn't- I'm spinning, round & round. This is why updates haven't been happening as much on the blog. I hope you can understand. But after we get through Spring Break it should settle down.Now I am off to eat & go try to run 5 or 6 miles with out passing out. Wish me luck!

1 comment:

Jen said...

Life is so many crazy cycles!